Ruth Wijaya

It drags you to endless dark-hole

Few days ago, I text my friend and asked him to have drinks with me. Then he asked, “are you sad so you asked to meet me?” I laughed, “do I always asking you to meet when I’m sad?” He replied, “you always drunk whenever you sad and you always sad after. Wait, I don’t know which one comes first but just want to make sure that you are okay”

I thought, I am always this happy go lucky person. Indeed, I keep the eternal sadness just to keep my happiness in control. I don’t know if it makes sense, but life is not always about happiness. We need sadness to define what happy is. No, it is not depression in my case. Hm… no, I don’t think so. Constant sadness just to keep me grounded, less bubbly.

Ah, whatever… maybe I just need to write it down.