Dua Puluh Dua Satu

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Halo! Saya masih hidup! Sehat, waras dan berbahagia. Sungguh.

Memang, saya mengalami pasang surut perasaan dalam beberapa bulan terakhir ini. Penyebabnya banyak, memang kehilangan pekerjaan menjadi pukulan terbesar dan banyak hal yang akhirnya tersangkut paut. Kenapa nggak cari kerja lagi secepatnya? Atau memulai usaha secepatnya… jangan hanya mengomel dan menyesali diri saja. Oh… percayalah, saya punya seribu teori dan motivasi untuk menggerakkan mood saya, tapi ya begitulah.

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Winning Life

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While having my afternoon walk, and my mind goes wandering to dream and reality, suddenly it hit me, who am I competing with?

All the time, I joke that: we never win from life as no one will ever get out from it alive. No one. Okay, I will not debate with bible’s famous stories of Enoch and… of course Jesus. Right?! Death is certain for all human being. Face it, we are not saint or special prophet or Son of God. We are just like other millions, spec of dust.

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With Or Without You

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… I can’t live.

You sing. You lose. Hahaha.

I don’t know how to start writing. I want to draw but I cannot pick up pencil. Seriously, for hours, I just sit, holding pencil and don’t know how to start my drawing. I know well what I want to draw. I couldn’t start it. Lyfe moves fast. A roller coaster life still on going.

I’m suck with words, but I’m trying.

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Million Lights

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Almost midnight when the plane taking off, and outside I can see million lights of your city. In few seconds, I completely flying over your city. There one light among those million is yours; you and your lover now. I still feel cold pain slicing my left chest spreading to my back whenever I remember you. I couldn’t help it. I should able to stop to think about you by now but every second, memories flooding and reminds me of you. The harder I tried, the more it keep coming back.

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A Sigh

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What’s better to do if you cannot sleep at midnight? Correct. Write a blog post. Well, I’m trying to keep the promise (to myself) that I will write regularly and to add the challenge, let’s do it in English.

I don’t know what I’m doing, for sure, but life is like that. Challenges meant that we are alive. Our existence depends on how we survive the challenge. Not necessarily win it, as no one will ever win and get out alive from this life.

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Pokoknya, Minta Sama Tuhan Aja!

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Iman dan hal-hal yang kita inginkan.

Ya kalau lagi bokek terutama, saya selalu bilang dalam hati, ya Tuhaaaan…. mbokyao tolong aku ini dikasih rejeki, uang banyak jadi mau ngapa-ngapain gampang! Tolong ya Tuhan, kasih hambaMu ini rejeki… trus ngarepnya, ujug-ujug pas buka tas, terdapat bergepok-gepok seratusan ribu gitu. Kan namanya aja ngayal.

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Sadness

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It drags you to endless dark-hole

Few days ago, I text my friend and asked him to have drinks with me. Then he asked, “are you sad so you asked to meet me?” I laughed, “do I always asking you to meet when I’m sad?” He replied, “you always drunk whenever you sad and you always sad after. Wait, I don’t know which one comes first but just want to make sure that you are okay”

I thought, I am always this happy go lucky person. Indeed, I keep the eternal sadness just to keep my happiness in control. I don’t know if it makes sense, but life is not always about happiness. We need sadness to define what happy is. No, it is not depression in my case. Hm… no, I don’t think so. Constant sadness just to keep me grounded, less bubbly.

Ah, whatever… maybe I just need to write it down.

Tindergame

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Of course, I’m in for this game. What’s more fun rather that judging men from his look and decide to swipe it right or left? The power on my finger!

Left right left right left right match keep swiping left left left right left right right match keep swiping, and you consumed few giga from your data. Just wasted time but it does work for some people. Continue reading “Tindergame” →

For Sale: Love & Relationship

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Few days ago, I met a girl, who I knew from blog. We were being in contact for quite a while since Meike contacted me to be one of her respondent for her thesis but this is our very first meeting. As Meike read my blog and vice versa, we just hit off like old friend, wait, just like older & younger sisters. Hahaha… despite the fact that Meike is more than a decade younger than me, our conversation was smooth and time passed so fast. It was really nice to meet you, Mei. Continue reading “For Sale: Love & Relationship” →